Medryn
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Corpora Rewrite Comments *LONG* - 2008/11/21 21:56
These are my comments on Cullum's Corpora re-write. The document itself is available here: gaming.rhioshan.com/Iron%20Mountains%20Corpora%20Rewrite%20-%20Draft%201.pdf
My comments:
General:
--We need to define what it means for a group to have "members". I would suggest # of members = Number of unique sign ins per month over a 6 month period.
--Do we need to define home park?
Change "All-Kingdom Althing" to "Imperial Althing" Where the hell did this AKA term come from? It makes it sound like the CoM. Make this change throughout the text.
Section I
--C. Add something here allowing groups outside of 150 miles to be brought in to the core by Althing. Also do we want groups within 150 miles to have to petition? Or does simply creating a group grant membership in the Empire?
--E.1.a.ii.A -- Add the same language regarding higher orders that is used in section B, or make that language a separate section E deliniating that higher awards and honors may be awarded with consent of the monarch. Make this change in the corosponding sections for Barony, Duchy and Principality
--E.2.a.i -- Do we want any requirements for principality such as not within 150 miles of another principality, must have at least one Duchy, must have x number of members etc.?
--E.2.a.iii.B -- Should be limited to 9 in non ladder awards as well.
--E.2.b -- I suggest using Seneschal
Section II
--A.2 -- Change from "shall be removed" to "shall step down" or "shall descend". Want to make sure it is clear that this removal is automatic as a function of corpora.
--A.4 -- Change "head officer" to "Chief Executive Officer"
--A.4.a.iii -- Do we need to define fiduciary for those non lawyers among us?
--A.4.b.i.A-- Change "the tournament" to "The Crown Qualifications Tourney"
--A.4.b.vi-- Bear with me while I lay out some philosophy and why I am suggesting this change. In terms of decision making in matters of importance and oversight three people is always better than two. This way a decision can always be reached and "conspiracy" is less likely. You never run in to a situation where a decision must be reached but your decisionmakers can't agree. This is why we have three branches of government in the mundane world each acts as a check on the other. The same model should be followed in Amtgard. Mundane government has the Executive, Legislative and Judicial branches of Government, each with their own perview. In Amtgard we have no legislative branch (excluding the true democratic Althing), nor do we have a "judiciary" so to speak. Instead we have an Executive branch (made up of the Monarch and Regent and to a lesser extent the Champion), an Administrative branch (The PM and again to a lesser extent the Champion) and a "Rules" branch (The GMR, Reeves Guild, and to a lesser extent again, the Champion). My suggestion is that in all matters of essential decision making and oversight (I'll spell out the sections where i think it applies), we maintain that three branch distinction. The Monarch, PM and GMR should be the first in line for these duties, with their roles filled by their various subordinates if a conflict or unavailability exists. So for the actual changes to this section I would suggest that the Monarch along with the PM and GMR be charged with running elections. If the Monarch is unavailable the Regent should take his place. If the GMR is unavailable a member of the reeves guild in good standing, acceptable to both the Monarch and PM, should take his place. If the PM is unavailable the Champion should take his place (I put champion here because although his duties probably are closer to the "rule" branch than the administrative we lack an alternative similar to the reeves guild to take the place of the PM). I am open to suggestions as to alternatives.
--A.4.c.v-- Clarify "Funds that are not spent..." I would suggest inserting "in this manner" or something else to explain what this means.
--A.4.c.ii-- Insert "and titles" after "non-ladder awards". Add "Awards and titles created in this manner by the Imperial Monarch shall be added to Appendix C "Iron Mountains Unique Awards" by the Imperial Prime Minister upon the Imperial Monarch's request. The Appendix entry shall indicate at a minimum the name of the award, suggested criteria, when and how it may be given, and any title/heraldry/or garb accoutrement associated with that award. In the case of Titles created in this manner the Imperial Monarch may also request that the title be added to the order of precedence, and the Prime Minister shall insert the title in the requested position upon approval of the Imperial Althing"
--A.5-- Change "Arts & Sciences" to "Secondary Executive" --This is a huge pet peeve of mine. We lie to folks when we indicate that a regent is an a&s officer only. A good regent is a support for the monarch at least as much as he or she is in charge of a&s. This goes back to my 3 branches theory and I think makes for bad exepectations and crappy regents. It also makes folks who are potentially valuable officers shy away from the position because they either aren't artisans or don't want to be.
--A.5.c.i-- Should Regents be able to give Lions? Clarify that they may give Masterhoods in the various orders at the Imperial level.
--A.5.c.ii-- See above note for A.4.c.ii replacing Monarch with Regent where appropriate
--A.6.a.iii-- Same thing as A.4.a.iii, do we need to define fiduciary?
--A.6.a.ii.D-- Do we need to include that updating is part of "maintaining"?
--A.6.b.ii.E-- See the above note on A.4.b.vi
--A.6.c.i.B-- see above note on A.4.c.v
--A.7.a.i-- Add the word "qualified" before "candidates..."
--A.7.b.i-- What the hell does this mean? Cut this section in its entirety
--A.8.b.iv-- See the above note on A.4.b.vi
--A.8.c-- Looks like a cut and paste error. Replace "prime minister" with "Guildmaster of Reeves"
--B.2-- As I said above I prefer the term Seneschal
--B.2.a.i-- Appointed? Really? I'm not totally opposed, but we might want to let the Crown Lands elect their own officer
Section III
--A.1.b.i-- Is this in the current corpora? Given the requirement that declarations be made prior to the tourney are we okay allowing declared tickets to change after the results of the tourney are known?
--A.1.f-- Might I suggest inserting "or no declarations are made."
--A.1.f.v.B-- Insert what happens if the candidates who stepped up fail to qualify.
--B.1-- We need to define home park
--B.2-- Does this mean that anyone who attends at any park may vote in their Althings? Not just home park?
Section IV
Generally--
Get rid of the heraldry test. We are the only kingdom that uses one and I have rarely if ever seen it used. It is a hassle and not worth the effort.
Change "construction" to "sciences" or change the definition of the categories to "construction"
The following changes reduce the required quals for champion and certain other officers. We have a hard enough time getting folks to want to qual for this office, we don't need to make it harder
--B.1.a.ii-- Drop this from 6 to 3 categories. and do not allow any fights to count towards quals
--B.1.b.ii-- Drop this from 6 to 3 categories, do not allow fighting quals
--B.1.c.ii-- Drop this from 4 to 2, do not allow fighting quals or remove qualification reqs all together at this level
--B.1.d.1-- Drop number required from 7 to 5
--B.1.d.ii--Drop this from 4 to 2, do not allow fighting quals, or remove qualification reqs all together at this level
--B.1.e.i-- Drop this from 5 to 3
--B.1.e.ii-- remove
--B.2.a-- Get rid of this section. I hate the heraldry test
--C--Prime Ministers should have to pass a corpora test as well. If you only want them to take one test you could eliminate the rulebook portion, although some of their duties may be influenced by the rules.
--D-- Given my three branches Model I think the GMR needs to pass a corpora test
Section V
--B.1.ii-- in all subsections change from "another construction category" to "another sciences category"
--B.4-- There is no B.4, I know, we need to fix that. We should insert a section defining the 1-5 scoring system and any other requirements that we expect to always be followed. This could also be added to B.1
Section VI
--Change the name to Imperial Althing as noted above, unless there is a reason to keep it "All Kingdom Althing" that I'm missing
--It looks like there is a formatting error. All other sections follow A.1.a.i This one looks like it is 1.a.i.A. It needs to be fixed, for clarity sake I will refer to the paragraphs as they are currently numbered
--2.a.ii-- Add "Provided that those clarifications do not conflict with official clarifications issued by the Inter-Kingdom Circle of Monarchs (IKCOM). Clarifications made in this way are valid until overrulled by or confirmed by the IKCOM, and shall be maintained in Appendix B "Imperial Rules Clarifications" When overrulled or confirmed the Imperial Prime Minister shall remove the clarification from Appendix B.
--3.b-- Add the words "no less than" before both instances of "four weeks before..."
--3.c.-- Add the words "At least" before both instances of "two weeks before..."
Section VIII
--A.2.b.i-- Should we allow the monarch's portaion to be used with his consent?
--C.3-- Should we allow expenditures for Corpora required events above and beyond the monarch's 10%?
Section X
-Do we want to leave this as Monarch and PM or require 2 of 3 Monarch, PM, GMR?
--C.2.a-- Add to the end "The Monarch and Prime Minister may strip any Title, Award or Honor previously granted by the Empire of the Iron Mountains or Its sub groups.
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